Ex Boyfriends?

I'm only saying this because it's been happening.....A lot. Otherwise I wouldn't care enough to even write a post about it. 

I understand that some of you are just trying to look out for me. And others (most of you) just want to get in on some drama. Either way, it doesn't matter.

Two of my exes were seen talking shit about me together via Facebook. 

That's fine. 

You don't have to come running, telling me or showing me what you saw. I don't care. I really, honestly do not care. If it bothers you, defend me yourself. You are able to see the post in your news feed right? Well. Leave a comment. Tell them to shut up. Send them a message. Defend my name. But don't come running to me gossiping about it.

I don't want to see that shit nor does it even bother me. My feelings aren't hurt. I try to be nice and get along with everyone. I keep to myself, I don't even mention their names anymore. Or even think of them for that matter (until some drama seeker comes running to me flapping their mouths and ruins my peace and quiet). As far as I'm concerned, I never even knew those boys. They were a small speed bump in the road of my life.

If they feel the need to talk shit about me (even after so much time has gone by), more power to them. 

They aren't over it yet. That's cool. I understand.

My relationships with these two people were very unhappy ones. I've been on anti-depressants, lost my sanity, and spent a very long time being emotionally drained by constant fighting and being mistreated. I'M the one that left. I'M the one that got fed up and called it off. I'M the one that moved forward with my life and found better things to occupy my time. What they have to say about me is irrelevant.

I'm not saying I was always right. I had my flaws and mistakes just as much as the next person. But I won't take all the credit for my past relationships going to shit. Just because they still worry themselves with it doesn't mean I do.

The fact that they had to partner up and become buddies is sad on it's own. If I cared enough, I would actually feel sad and worried for them and wonder why they haven't moved on yet.

Whatever helps them get through it, I guess. It doesn't matter. Time has passed. I have grown. I have found happiness. I don't need to know what they are doing, and I don't feel the desire to care. Let them talk. They are the ones that got left behind. They are the ones I ran away from. They are the ones that couldn't handle me.. and they were replaced with someone that can.

I'm getting married in 13 days to the man of my dreams. The very man I thought about every day for 12 years. The man that has held a place in my heart since 7th grade. Someone who treats me the way those two couldn't. Someone who gives me the respect I deserve. Someone who doesn't talk down to me, cheat on me, lie to me, or ignore me. 

If you can't defend me on your own, that's fine. But don't run to me with the drama. If you want to be buddies with these two, I don't care about that either. If you want to agree with them or talk shit with them, feel free. I know the whole story. I'm the one who was actually there 100% of the time. I'm the one who knows the truth. 

Don't think they are that bad? That's ok, too. Maybe you're right. Maybe I'm the terrible one and they are as innocent as it gets. I don't know. You date them and let me know how it works out for ya. It's none of my concern.

But I'm doing better now. The happiest I've ever been. Kerry Seifried is the man I've waited for all my life. I don't need anything else. And Kerry's opinion is the only one that matters to me. My relationship with him is very different from the relationships in my past. We don't fight every day to the point of my health being jeopardized. He doesn't lie to me about every little thing. He doesn't cheat on me or drool over other women at every turn. He stands by me when no one else will. If someone speaks poorly of me, he calls them out and defends my name. He doesn't put hands on me in a negative manner and he doesn't judge me or try to change who I am or try to control me. Which are things those other guys never could accomplish. Kerry and I have a connection I never had with anyone else and our relationship is different because we are soul mates.

The events from my past were as bad as they were because I was dedicating my time to people who were not meant to be in my life. The reason everyone has started on this kick that I'm "crazy" or that I'm "psychotic" is because those boys are the ones who drove me to that point. Yes, in my past I was crazy. I'm known for it because I spent many years in negative relationships that caused me to lose my mind and my cool. Away from them, I have grown in to a better person. I got my sanity back a long time ago. However, whether the rest of you realize that or not is the last thing on my mind. I'm not worried about it.

I have nothing to say about the boys in my past. They are in my past for a reason. What they do and say are not my business. If they still feel the need to break me down and belittle and disrespect me even after I have been long gone, that's on them. The only thing that changed is that I got tired of hearing it and left them a long time ago. So now they do it without me around to hear it and cry over it.

So.. they are still ass holes and haven't changed a bit. Months and years later my name is still in their mouth. Ok... Well, let me put it on the cover of "Big Whoop" magazine. 

I'm not surprised. I never expected any different from them. This kind of thing is one of the many reasons I left them both. They talked shit about me while we were together. It's only expected that they would continue after I "broke their hearts" and left them behind. They were too weak to handle a woman like me. They just weren't strong enough to meet my standards. Kerry is. So...

Whether it's an ex, some douche bag who's pissed he couldn't get in my pants, some gossiping female, some idiot I went to high school with, an ex's ex, or any other form of human being... Let them talk.

Ok, so I'm a psycho bitch. Ok, so I'm a freak. Ok, so I'm a witch. Ok, so I'm flawed. Ok, so I'm difficult to deal with and impossible to handle. 

You know what else I am?

HAPPY.

I've got better things to worry about. I have a marriage to enjoy. ❤️